Enlightened Engagement

Perfection 2 I mentioned in my last post That perfection is in the eyes of the beholder. I wanted to expand upon this idea because all of us have different ideas but there are some constants in our society, or any society, that we have to adapt to. That means that, depending upon which societal constraints that you live under, perfect also is determined by the laws, ethics, and culture that you are governed by. In one culture or society it is perfect to get married at an early age of 12. In our culture it is considered so imperfect it is illegal. In one society it is perfect and desirable to run around completely naked. You would get arrested in our society if you did that. The regulations surrounding your given reality is what you have to adjust your idea of perfection to. Even though different cultures and social systems have different ideas of perfection most ideas about what is perfect can be boiled down to what is right. What is right can be interpreted in different ways as wel...

Perfection Perfection like beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. What this means is that beauty as well as perfection vary with each individual. How can perfection change? What is it? If we do something different is it still perfect? These are but a few of the questions that people, including me, think about when considering perfection. There are as many definitions of perfection as there are human beings on the Earth. There are as many ideas of what perfection is as there are cultures, environmental experiences, and behavioral reactions to our reality. What is perfect for one person may be totally imperfect for another. That being said, there are common threads that most human beings share that govern their perspective of what perfection is and more often than not, if that idea of perfection is not achieved, it will give us headaches, stress, high blood pressure, anger, hatred, shame, frustration, and every other negative emotion possible. A classic example is something I experie...

Finding Joy If you are like me, finding joy is not a difficult thing to do, but it is something that takes practice, dedication, and focus to do effectively. If you are like me you laugh at the comical things that happen in your life, you genuinely smile at a child as you see them, or you think pleasant thoughts as you recollect a joyful memory. We all do this instinctively and that is easy. We find joy all around us every moment we give awareness to one or more of our experiences. The gentle sway of the trees, the colorful sunrise, or the sweet taste of a cold glass of water on a hot summers day are all ways we may experience joy as we progress through our day. This type of joy surrounds us and we don't have to do anything, other than observe and experience it, to make it a part of our day. I think what most of us want to do is to increase that joy. This goal is a matter of seeing, feeling, and experiencing that joy as it passes us in turbulent times. Most of us find little joy...

Never Give Up A friend of mine was working with her child and was trying to explain a preference she wanted and he didn't understand it so he kept annoying her with questions and behavior that frustrated her so she said, "I give up." I told her, "Never give up, just pick your battles." This was meant as an instructional statement to her to reevaluate her thought process. Of course you can give up on anything you want. However, what you are doing, when you give up on some goal or behavior you want to change, is demonstrating to yourself and those in your world that the behavior or goal was not important to you. This may be true. The goal or behavior may not be important to you and you don't want to pursue it any more and that is perfect. We all do that. We all quit. We all start something and then decide it isn't the work. This is OK. If you consider the goal or behavior important and then quit you will feel bad that you did. Later on you will have to...

Quotes on Optimism Positive Attitude "An optimist sees the glass half full while a pessimist sees the glass as half empty.”  - Anonymous "When you look at the possibilities instead of the problems, the future is filled with endless opportunities." - Zig Ziglar "A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." - Winston Churchill "Real optimism is aware of problems but recognises the solutions, knows about difficulties but believes they can be overcome,   sees the negatives but accentuates the positives,   is exposed to the worst but expects the best,   has reason to complain but chooses to smile." - William Arthur Ward "A cloudy day is no match for a sunny disposition." - William Arthur Ward "Few things in this world are more powerful than A Positive Push, A Smile, A Word of Optimism, and Hope." - Rich DeVos "Positivity is a choice. Is the glass half empty or...

Do or Don't There is No Try One of my favorite characters from the Star Wars fame is Yoda. He is an alien with some super natural powers. His ability to connect to the almighty or universal power that connects us all is one of a kind. He is like a super hero philosopher who also has the ability to defeat bad guys, because it wouldn't be a good movie without that. One of most poignant sayings that has significant meaning to me is, "Do or Don't there is no try." What I believe he means by this is that we can do something or not but there is no try. It is up to us and the amount of effort we put into a goal whether or not we accomplish it. Most of us, including myself use the word try as an escape for something we don't want to do. We say, "I'll try to make it to your party or I'll try to get that job done," but it is just an escape clause for us because in our mind we don't really want to do that job or go to that party. No matter what t...

Take 5 As I have mentioned in many blogs and also in my book, "261 Mantras, Motivation, and Magic for your Workdays" there are many things that you can do to be happy. One of those things is super simple and yet difficult to do for most of us. That one thing is to take 5. Take 5 means to take a few minutes whenever you can to notice what is going on around you. It doesn't even have to be 5 minutes. It can be only a couple of seconds and that noticing has a profound effect upon your peace of mind and happiness. The more you do this noticing during the day the more thankful you are for all the beauty you have in your life. The greater amount of time you spend in seeing what it around you the greater your ability to enjoy the splendor of our world. It is easy to be thankful for a sunset, the crystal blue sky, a baby's innocent cry, easy flowing traffic, or a myriad of other situations and events. The more noticing you do of all these life events the more contentment fi...

You Only Get One Chance When living life you only get one chance to live each day. Now I know that most of us believe in a life after death and that may be true or not. There is only circumstantial and spotty evidence to prove that claim. Even if there is a here after we don't know what it may look like. There are people that believe that it looks like Earth only it contains only good stuff from the mind of the observer. There are those that believe we come back again to get a do over if we need. There are those that believe we return to the mind of God and get mixed up with every other existence as if we were a spiritual soup. Whatever it is it is not the point of this blog. We get one chance to do what we do right here and now. Whether there is an after life or not our chance to be a loving parent, to be nice to your neighbor, or to care for our environment is only here and now. If we get a chance for a do over after we die that is great, but personally I want to do my best in...

Do One Thing We often times go through our day with nothing but thoughts of fret about the future, regrets about the past, worries about our situation, condemnation for others who don't fit our scheme of perfection, and denials about our responsibility in the problems we create for ourselves. This is true for me as well. I do all the above and I consider myself enlightened. I consider myself a person of love, consideration, contemplation, and care and I do all those things that keep me imprisoned in all the negative aspects that life has to offer. The thing that keeps me sane is that I can do something about all those things I do that make me unhappy. I can do one thing each day, each hour, or each moment that will give me solace toward the goals that I set for myself to become the person I want to become. If your goal is to become rich take each day, hour, and moment and dedicate yourself to that one thing, but leave the rest in the recycle container. If you can do that one thi...

It is never too late many people will tell you. This parable, mantra, or saying has been used across the generations. The truth of the matter is that it is too late for many things to occur in your life. If you are 30, it is too late to go back and experience the wonder of being a teen. If you are 40, it is too late to get your hair back. If you are 50, it is too late to live the innocence a baby experiences. Maybe it is too late to do many things but the one, and most important thing, it is not too late to do is enjoy the day you are experiencing currently. We all live in the here and now, even if we don't know it. What we have here and now is all that matters. If I could go back and change anything in my life it would be the knowledge I have now about enjoying the present. I had a difficult childhood with many negative experiences that filled my existence. However, there were many times in my troubled life that I could have lived in the moment and filled my life with much joy if...

Today I saw a beautiful woman of distinction having problems with her kids. Having children is always a challenge and blessing wrapped into a big burrito of love. Children will always test there parents resolve over specific issues that are considered important to the kids. These tests come in the form of challenges to the parental authority, keeping something they want, or finding out how far they can push the issue. Whatever the reason children will find a way to test their parents resolve.We all do these childish behaviors in our daily lives, however, children do it more often and if we let them, they do it successfully. In this specific incident the children were playing with some toys while she was trying to read to them and even though she asked them to listen and stop many times they continued until, she finally got up and took the items away. Her frustration got higher and deeper until her emotions boiled and she got angry. This anger was something I thought could have been av...

Today I saw a beautiful woman of distinction having problems with her kids. Having children is always a challenge and blessing wrapped into a big burrito of love. Children will always test there parents resolve over specific issues that are considered important to the kids. These tests come in the form of challenges to the parental authority, keeping something they want, or finding out how far they can push the issue. Whatever the reason children will find a way to test their parents resolve.We all do these childish behaviors in our daily lives, however, children do it more often and if we let them they do it successfully. In this specific incident the children were playing with some toys while she was trying to read to them and even though she asked them to listen and stop many times they continued until she finally got up and took the items away. Her frustration got higher and deeper until her emotions boiled and she got angry. This anger was something I thought could have been avoi...